Parents/Teens

https://www.uofmhealth.org/news/archive/201907/failure-launch-parents-are-barriers-teen-independence

Failure to Launch: Parents are barriers to teen independence 

National Poll: While most parents say they are doing enough to prepare their teen for adulthood, they gave low rankings of their teen’s ability to handle basic tasks. 

ANN ARBOR, Mich. – Nearly all parents (97%) in a new national poll say they are helping their teen become more independent by using strategies like allowing them to make more choices (86%), pushing them to handle things themselves (74%) and no longer doing things for them (65%).  

Despite this, one quarter of parents surveyed say they are the main barrier to their teen’s independence by not taking the time or effort to give their teen more responsibility, according to the C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital National Poll on Children’s Health at the University of Michigan.

“As children become teenagers, the role of parents shifts to helping them gain the knowledge and experience they will need for being independent adults,” says poll co-director Sarah Clark, M.P.H.

“This process of transitioning from childhood to adulthood includes everything from preparing for work and financial responsibility, to taking care of one’s health and well-being. Our poll suggests that parents aren’t letting go of the reins as often as they could be to help teens successfully make that transition.”

Teen Road to independence map: Percent of parents who say their 17-18 year old handles tasks on their own

The report is based on responses from a nationally-representative sample of 877 parents of at least one child 14-18 years old.

Sixty percent of parents polled say their teen’s characteristics are barriers to becoming more independent, such as not being mature enough (24%), not having time (22%) or not knowing enough (14%) to take on more responsibility.

In contrast, one quarter of parents admit their own role in impeding their teen’s independence, saying it’s quicker and less hassle to do things themselves (19%) or they don’t think about how to give teens more responsibility (7%).

Parents gave the lowest rating of teen independence for tasks related to health care. When it comes to their teen’s health, parents may feel responsible for ensuring that appropriate care is received and medical advice is followed, Clark says.

“We did not ask about life-or-death health care matters. But we did ask parents whether their teens could independently handle very basic tasks, such as taking care of minor injuries, figuring out the correct dose of a medication or calling to make a doctor’s appointment,” says Clark.

“It is crucial for teens to begin taking ownership of their health before they enter adulthood when they will face more complex, adult tasks.”

“Parental over-involvement impedes teens from gaining experience and confidence to be independent in all aspects of their lives,” Clark adds.

Parents are nearly universal in the belief that it is important for teens to make mistakes, but they also feel they should prevent teens from mistakes that are too serious.

“It is clear that parents recognize tension in helping teens move toward independence, and they agree that valuable learning experiences often result from a poor decision,” Clark says.

Clark recommends parents to position themselves as a back-up resource, to be consulted only if the teen cannot handle the matter independently. Parents should also establish specific milestones and create opportunities to mentor their teens in gaining experience and confidence while reaching those goals.

“Some parents justify taking control over certain responsibilities because they don’t believe their teen is ‘mature enough.’ But this type of logic inhibits their teen from actually becoming more mature,” Clark says.

“Parents need to carve out more time for supporting teens in their transition to adulthood.”

Self Improvement : The Moral Bucket List

Often we need to remember to foster and nourish our moral and inner selves, especially in a time when we are taught to focus on marketable skills, rather than emotional and sympathetic virtues. Learning to better yourself by being a better friend and confidant to others is an amicable goal, and this article gives some great ideas on how to do that. A highly recommended read.

Read the article here

“Adventures in Depression”

Sometimes hearing other people’s stories and feelings about depression can make you feel less alone. Adding humor always helps. This honest and well-written comic-book story outlines the author’s struggle with depression and self-loathing that gives anyone good insight into what depression really feels like.

Read the article here

Depression Part Two

Another clever and insightful story from Hyperbole and a Half. A sincere and helpful look into how depression feels to those who experience it. If you or someone you know is going through depression, it helps to know how they feel!

Reading through this comic, the drawings are silly enough to add some levity to such a serious topic, and still illustrate real feeling.

Read the article here

Communicating Emotions

At home or in the workplace, we often reply to “How are you?” with stock answers, rather than actually answering the question. This article goes into the importance of being able to communicate your actual emotions and how encouraging openness is a benefit to productivity and overall well-being for employees.

“It just dawned on me,” he told his colleagues, “how much likely goes unsaid between us and what the cost of holding that in must be.”

Making sure people know you really want to know how they are can make a big difference.

Read the article here

Teen Suicide on the Rise in Modern Society

An informative article about rising rates and concerns about teen suicides in the US. High expectations, pressure and inadequate support may be responsible for this. What can we do to reverse this trend?

“It reflects on the shortfalls of some modern parenting, which, in her view, can be not only overprotective but overbearing, micromanaging the lives of children, pointing them toward specific mile markers of achievement and denying them any time to flail or room to fail. They wind up simultaneously frazzled and fragile.”

Read the article here

Diagnosing: Is it depression or something else?

This article goes into a case study about a patient who exhibited signs of depression, but, as his therapist adeptly noticed, it’s not always depression causing people to be removed, anguished, and distant. Neglect, anxiety and early truama can cause depression-like symptoms, but need very different treatment strategies. Being aware that many things can make a person feel depressed or closed-off from the world is important when trying to help people get to the root of their issues and start to make progress.

Read the Article Here

Yoga & PTSD : A great method for coping with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

A great study on the effects of yoga on treating PTSD. This article follows an Army veteran who gave up his career in the military to teach yoga full time. Considering all the issues with current drug treatments for PTSD, this drug-free, healthy alternative is a great way to go, and makes for a wonderful read. Yoga has been shown to help people with stress, anxiety, and depression.

Read the Article Here